Hooked On Phonics - The Jess/Rory Relationship - Gilmore Girls

[aragons.livejournal.com]

I'd like to say a quick thank you to:  krys33  77amy77 and  somehearts_x3 for the handholding while freaked out; the wonderful people at  jessrory, particularly  drowning_inyou2 whose constant posts have helped make this essay what it is. Also insane gratitude goes to  kudosandhuzzah for doing a quick grammar check for me. Without further ado I give you: 

  

'Hooked on Phonics': 
An Examination of the Jess/Rory relationship 


“It is what it is.” As any Literati fan worth their salt knows, these five words were spoken by Jess Mariano during his last on-screen meeting with Lorelai Leigh ‘Rory’ Gilmore. The relationship between these two captivating characters on the former CW television show Gilmore Girls, is one that intrigued many viewers from the very start, combining lust and literature in a completely new and more than occasionally heartbreaking way. 

-

Before I begin to analyse the two of them and what makes them such a believable, shippable couple, I should give some explanation of the background of both these characters and the backdrop to their relationship, the town of Stars Hollow. 
   Jess Mariano, nephew of Stars Hollow resident Luke ‘Diner Man’ Danes, arrives in the small, zany town in late 2002. Fans have decided that, given the few references on the show, Jess probably grew up in the backstreets of New York. Regardless of Amy Sherman-Palladino‘s unclear exposition, it is certain that Jess was not brought up with wealth, and most probably with little care. His mother, Liz Danes was still in her late teens when she had Jess, and his father, Jimmy Mariano (hot dog king extraordinaire) left immediately after he was born. As a result Jess has never known his father. 

LUKE: You know, the last time I saw you is right after Liz gave birth. You were gonna go out and buy some diapers and meet us back at the apartment. Remember that? 
JIMMY: Yes. 
LUKE: You went out, but you never came back.

 Most likely due to the intense pressure of having a child so young, it is generally agreed upon that Liz suffered from various substance abuses, not to mention a string of bad relationships. Prior to his penultimate year of high school, Liz packs Jess on a bus to Stars Hollow, as she simply cannot handle him any more. 

LUKE: Well, 'cause apparently he's been getting into some trouble and Liz is afraid he's heading for something bad, and rather than handle it herself, she's just giving up. She's sending him here so I can straighten him out. 

Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, known as Rory to the town, has lived in Stars Hollow almost her whole life. It’s clear from her very first moments on the show that due to her very close relationship with her mother, coupled with the ease of small town life, she is a very sheltered, inexperienced young woman. Her aforementioned relationship with her mother, Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, is mainly due to the fact that Lorelai became pregnant with Rory at sixteen. They have more of a sisterly relationship, than that of mother and daughter.

 LORELAI: We are best friends first and mother and daughter second.

 Rory comes, originally, from a very privileged background, her grandparents Emily and Richard Gilmore are shown to live in the ritzy area of Hartford, Connecticut. Christopher Hayden, Rory’s father is also part of the Hartford elite. However, Lorelai couldn’t handle the life her parents provided and ran away to Stars Hollow, taking the infant Rory with her. Lorelai found work as a maid in the Independence Inn, run by a woman called Mia who gave her a home in the form of the old pottery shed on the Inn grounds. This is where Rory spent her childhood years. Eventually ten years later, Lorelai saved up enough money and moved into Stars Hollow. When Jess meets Rory, she is currently dating Dean Forrester, a native of Chicago who moved into town the year before and is her very first boyfriend. 

Stars Hollow itself, and its many inhabitants, do play a role in both creating and ending the relationship between these two teenagers. It’s a relatively large town, with a population of 9973 people. It’s situated somewhere near Hartford, Connecticut; and is 22.8 miles away from Yale University, where Rory enrols after high school. It is a relatively welcoming town, filled with many colourful characters and somewhat kitschy festivals. Most notorious of Stars Hollow‘s residents are Miss Patty, head of the neighbourhood gossip chain and her cohort Babette, Rory’s well-meaning neighbour. Taylor, the town selectmen, local bylaw enforcer also poses a quiet, or perhaps not so quiet threat to the relationship; his immense dislike of Jess is well known by all in the town (see episode 2.08 - The Ins and Outs of Inns for the infamous ‘Ban Jess Mariano’ town meeting.) However, this very close knit society causes problems for our two teenagers, especially considering Jess’ status as the ‘town hoodlum.’

 -

When one reads these descriptions, it can be hard to see why these two, seemingly very different adolescents could work as a couple. After all, Jess is sarcastic, rowdy, makes no attempt to integrate himself and skips school; Rory is a dedicated student, often scaring her mother by her intense focus, with a place a prestigious prep school and Harvard ambitions of foreign correspondence. So what is it that could possibly make these two highly different adolescents interested in one another? 

The first reason is that they find someone with a similar family background to their own. Rory’s boyfriend Dean comes from the stereotypical nuclear family: working husband, stay at home mother and a younger sister with whom he has a good solid relationship. Neither Rory nor Jess have ever had a steady relationship with their respective fathers and both mothers had them very young. As  webehput it: 
“The pair also share a similar history, which I think made it easier to understand some of each others real world frustrations.” 
It may sound a trivial reason, but considering Rory’s discomfort with the idea of family as Dean sees it, as shown by the following scene from the 1.14 ‘That Damn Donna Reed’, it is something that brings the two together, a commonality if you will, something that they can see and understand in the other that other people don’t. 

DEAN: I mean, it's a little over the top but the general idea of a wife cooking dinner for her husband and family, that's nice. Why is that not nice?
RORY: It's not just that. It's the having to have the dinner on the table as soon as the husband gets home and having to look perfect to do housework and the whole concept that her one point in life is to serve somebody else. 
… 
DEAN: Rory, my mom used to make dinner for my dad every day before she started working. And now she even does it on the weekends. So what does that say about her? 
RORY: It says that she has a choice and Donna Reed didn't.

 - 

Another important reason is their standing as equals with each other. As  drowning_inyou2said: 
“They treat each other as equals. They want the best for each other, even if it means they are not together, which I believe is why they work…They each believed the other could & was possible of doing whatever they put their minds to.” 
There is never a play for control of the other within the relationship, it’s all very give-and-take. An example of this once they’re a couple, is in episode 3.14, ‘Swan Song’ in which Jess worries that Rory’s sneaking around with Dean:  

RORY: This is an old subject, Jess. You know that Dean and I are friendly. 
JESS: I know you’re friendly. That doesn’t mean I don’t wanna punch him. 
RORY: This was not a plan. I was kidnapped by Miss Patty, so was he, that’s it. 
… 
JESS: Just tell me these things first so I don’t have to read about them on telephone poles. 
RORY: I will, I promise. 
JESS: Okay. 

This shows Jess is fine with her being friends with another guy, even one she dated, as long as she doesn’t hide it from him. When you contrast this with Dean’s aggressive reaction to the idea of Rory being with another boy, platonic or not (significant episodes being 1.09 ‘Rory‘s Dance’, 2.13 ‘There’s the Rub’), there is more trust in their relationship. Equally, when she’s in a relationship with Logan, he is immediately threatened by Jess. Whether this is simply because the chemistry between Rory and Jess is that palpable or because both Dean and Logan are more protective, I leave for you to decide. 

In the same conversation,  drowning_inyou2 mentioned that a perfect example of this equality, this wanting the best for each other, is found in their conversation in her car in episode 2.19 ‘Teach Me Tonight’ 

RORY: You know you’re smarter than most everybody at your school. It takes you like five minutes to finish a book. You read everything, you remember everything, you could ace those classes easily. Why don’t you? You don’t need a tutor. It’s crazy that they’re talking about leaving you back. J
ESS: Whatever. 
RORY: You can do anything you wanted, you can be anything you wanted. 
JESS: Rory. 
RORY: I. . .is it like a cool thing? 
JESS: I could care less about being cool. 
RORY: Well, inform me, please. 
… 
JESS: I’ll live where I live, I’ll work when I need money, and I’ll see where I end up. 
RORY: You could do more. 
JESS: Oh, here come the pompoms. 
RORY: No, no pompoms, just me saying you could do more. 

Rory is well aware that Jess “could do more”, and while not forcing him in anyway, nor cajoling; she tells him so, plainly and simply. There’s no pushing or pulling, just a statement that lets him know exactly how much she thinks of him. She regards him as her equal and doesn’t let him bullshit about not being capable or people having low expectations. From him she wants the truth and he gives it to her, willingly. I can think of only one time Jess actually lies to her, and it’s about a swan. (see 3.14 ‘Swan Song’ for an explanation). That even from the very beginning, he trusts her with things about himself without griping about it, feels significant to me. 

-

This leads me onto my next point beautifully; the way they are able to seek and bring out the best in each other. When Jess first arrives he is surly, monosyllabic and completely out of place. The fact that the background music playing when he takes his first real look at the town opens with the line: “This is hell”, only serves to enforce the idea that he does not want to be there. Throughout Jess’ stay in the town, it is clear that he neither fits in, nor actually wants to. He persists in playing practical jokes and generally making himself disliked by all, except Rory. Once he meets her, despite not getting on at all well with her mother, it is as if he makes a promise to himself to get Rory to like him. To gain at least one friend in this town he despises. This is not merely speculation, but a conclusion drawn from the way he interacts with her. From the very start you see him act completely differently when he‘s around Rory. And to some extent, Rory acts differently around him. 

This visible change in him when he’s with Rory is seen incredibly clearly in episode 2.13 ‘A Tisket, A Tasket’, (the episode most Literati fans say is the real starting point of their relationship.) To give some context, this episode revolves around Stars Hollow’s “Bid a Basket” festival, in which Rory makes a basket for Dean to bid on and Jess wins the bid (he ends up paying $90 for the pleasure of Rory’s company). At first she’s hesitant because she knows that spending the afternoon with Jess will cause yet another fight with Dean, but decides that she has to since he spent so much money on her. We see them seated on the bridge (which for the vast majority of Literati shippers has become ‘their place’.) discussing Hemingway and Ayn Rand, Jess and Rory’s favourite authors respectively. This here is the epitome of their time together, playfully bantering and discussing novels. Jess is calmer, enthusiastic, an altogether more agreeable person; Rory picks up on this: 

RORY: Really? Try it. The Fountainhead is classic. 
JESS: Yeah, but Ayn Rand is a political nut. 
RORY: Yeah, but nobody could write a forty page monologue the way that she could. 
JESS: Okay, tomorrow I will try again, and you will. . . 
RORY: Give the painful Ernest Hemingway another chance. Yes, I promise. 
JESS: You know, Ernest only has lovely things to say about you. 
RORY: Why are you only nice to me? 
JESS: Excuse me? 
RORY: An hour ago you were totally screwing with Dean and now you’re totally nice to me. 

This scene demonstrates the capability they have for working well as a couple. She brings out, quite literally, the best in him. He also brings out something else within her, an intensity we rarely see her share with Dean on anything other than TV. As Rory and Jess begin to spend more time together, the intensity each bring out in the other over almost anything, from books and music, to TV and food, to places and futures and dreams instantly overshadows the interactions between Rory and Dean. 
        In episode 2.21 ‘Lorelai’s Graduation Day’ just the prompt of a phone call from Jess causes Rory to be more impulsive. Not that I advocate skipping school at all, but that day in New York we see Rory more alive than she ever is with Dean, and in a way more so than when she is with Logan. Let me expand this point briefly; in season two, the times you see her talking with Dean and talking with Jess, you can see a visible difference in her reactions. With Dean she’s interested but she’s subdued, full of pop culture but a little less her. With Jess you see her argue her ideas, banter easily and it’s as if she’s been lit up. With Logan, Rory loosens up but on the way she loses herself, drops out of Yale and joins the DAR. It is no coincidence in my eyes that as soon as Jess reappears, she becomes Rory again, alive and interested and standing up for herself. There is a lot to be said for this quality in a relationship.

 - 

My penultimate point is that Jess fits into Rory’s life, heart and mind in a way that Dean and Logan never did. In the discussion post opened up in  jessrory,  webehsaid this: 
Jess was really the first guy to have anything in common with Rory. Dean and Rory were as different as they came. Logan and Rory shared an equality in their ability to intellectualize, but I think where their passions lie were ultimately incompatible…Rory and Jess shared a passion for the written word. This means that they could have in depth conversations about literature, which Rory can't do with anyone else but her grandfather.” 
This one common interest is ultimately what binds them together and never lets them go: literature. From the very first time they meet, in the season two episode ‘Nick and Nora, Sid and Nancy’, we see that they share this connection to literature. 

JESS: [looking at bookshelf] Wow, aren't we hooked on phonics. 
RORY: Oh, I read a lot. Do you read? 
JESS: Not much.
 [later at the end of the episode, Jess returns her copy of Allen Ginsberg’s ‘Howl’] 
JESS: I just wanted to put some notes in the margins for you. 
RORY: What? [looks through the book] You've read this before. 
JESS: About forty times. 
RORY: I thought you said you didn't read much. 
JESS: Well, what is much? 

While Dean has a certain interest in reading, we get the feeling that he mostly does this for her. As much as I love season one Dean, you can clearly see that they have very little in common. Jess sees this right away, and in one episode, ‘The Bracebridge Dinner’ (episode 2.10), almost becomes the mouthpiece for viewers like me who find Rory and Dean’s relationship deeply flawed. 

JESS: Hey, what do you and Dean talk about? 
RORY: What? 
JESS: I mean, does he know Bjork? 
RORY: I've played him some stuff. 
JESS: Hm. So you got a teacher-student thing going? 
RORY: Stop. 
JESS: No, really, I'm curious. What do you guys talk about? 
RORY: Everything. 
JESS: Like? 
RORY: Just everything, tons of stuff, whatever. 
JESS: It's just in the brief non-pugilistic time I've spent with him in class, he just doesn't seem like your kind of guy.
RORY: Well, he is my kind of guy. He's exactly my kind of guy. 
JESS: Okay. I guess I don't know him that well. 

Logan, whilst being equally intelligent and definitely articulate, displays his knowledge in an arrogant way, as if every conversation is a competition for the number of references dropped in. Jess utilises his knowledge in a very different manner. As we saw in his very first episode, he analyses as part of the reading experience. He shows his intelligence subtly, but articulately - if perhaps sharp. That Jess can debate literature gets him Paris’ vote from the very start. The season two episode “There’s the Rub” proves he can more than hold his own in the different circles Rory runs in: 

PARIS: A tragic waste of paper. 
JESS: I can’t believe you just said that.
 PARIS: Well, it’s true, the Beat’s writing was completely self-indulgent. I have one word for Jack Kerouac – edit. JESS: It was not self-indulgent. The Beats believed in shocking people, stirring things up. 
PARIS: They believed in drugs, booze, and petty crime. 
RORY: Well, then you can say that they exposed you to a world you wouldn’t have otherwise known. Isn’t that what great writing’s all about? 
PARIS: That was not great writing. That was the National Enquirer of the fifties. 
JESS: You’re cracked. 
PARIS: Typical guy response. Worship Kerouac and Bukowski, God forbid you’d pick up anything by Jane Austen. 
JESS: Hey, I’ve read Jane Austen. 
PARIS: You have? 
JESS: Yeah, and I think she would’ve liked Bukowski. 

In response to this scene, drowning_inyou2said:
 “[This is] one of my favorite scenes between the two …Jess, Rory, and Paris are all sitting in Rory's kitchen eating and talking about books. They're all having a good time, debating and such. And they're genuinely enjoying each other's company… Also, Paris doesn't even seem to be bothered by him, which really says something, in my opinion. Normally she has a very low tolerance for most, if not all, people, but he apparently met her standards.” 
She goes on to say that in a deleted scene from that same episode, Paris verbally gives her approval: 

PARIS: He's unbelievably cute and though his literary tastes leave a little to be desired, at least he has a literary taste.

 With this as further evidence of how Jess can garner respect if he so chooses, I imagine that had the show’s writers decided to introduce Jess and Richard Gilmore, they would have got on relatively well. Certainly Richard would‘ve been have impressed him with his intelligent, if somewhat brusque conversation; though perhaps disappointed by his future plans. When Jess wants to, which he usually does around Rory, he proves himself to be a thoroughly well-read, articulate young man with a wit to match Rory’s any day. 
 
sublymonalhad it down perfectly: 
“Jess was so much less awkward. Even though the town hated him, I think that dynamic was important because he gradually earned the trust of everyone in Rory's life like Paris and Lorelai. I think Jess is just a fantastic character for that and suitable [for Rory.]” 

- 

My final point rests on the impact of their relationship on the other. Despite their relationship being the shortest of Rory’s three romances, it is clear that this is the one that has branded her for life; as it is with Jess. Their story, in the words of Veronica Mars’ Logan Echolls, 
“Epic…Span[s] years and continents. Lives ruined and blood shed. Epic.” 
Years, continents (well, continent) and lives ruined has it about right. Jess pursued Rory for almost a year before they shared their first kiss, at Sookie’s wedding in 2.22 ‘I Can’t Get Started’ After that, things start to unravel until they reach a climax at Stars Hollow’s Annual Dance Marathon, where Dean finally has enough and dumps Rory near the end of the dance. Their relationship is rocky, filled with insecurity on both sides caused by Rory’s constant comparisons between Dean and Jess. So it’s no surprise that it comes to a stop after Jess fails to graduate and rides off to California to get to know his father. For most teen romances, that’s the end. Yet, Jess continues to pop up during the following year. Jess returns to New York resulting in several painful encounters in Season Four, when Jess is reluctantly visiting his mother/attempting to get his car back. So, in a year where they aren’t officially dating, Rory rejects several dates and Jess finally admits that he loves her. It is this season that should technically signify the end of their relationship as in the penultimate episode of the season, 4.21 ‘Last Week Fights, This Week Tights’ Jess asks Rory to run away with him; an offer she heatedly declines: 

JESS: Look, we'll go to New York. We'll work, we'll live together, we'll be together. It's what I want. It's what you want, too. 
RORY: No! 
JESS: I want to be with you, but not here. Not this place, not Stars Hollow. We have to start new. 
RORY: There's nothing to start! 
JESS: You're packed. Your stuff is all in boxes. It's perfect. You're ready. And I'm ready. I'm ready for this. You can count on me now. I know you couldn't count on me before, but you can now. You can. 
RORY: No! 
JESS: Look, you know we're supposed to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you two years ago, and you know it, too. I know you do. 
RORY: No, no, no, no, no! 
JESS: Don't say "no" just to make me stop talking or make me go away. Only say "no" if you really don't want to be with me. 
RORY: No! 

However, their story still doesn’t end. In 2006, a collected, mature Jess visits the out of control, almost college dropout Rory with a novel he says he could never have written without her. Jess forces her to take a good long look at herself and get back to who she is at heart; just as she inspired him to write the novel, he inspires her to get on with her life. 

JESS: I mean, with you! What's going on with you? 
RORY [stunned]: What do you mean? JESS: You know what I mean! I know you. I know you better than anyone! This isn't you. 
RORY: I don't know. 
JESS [passionately]: What are you doing? Living at your grandparents' place? Being in the DAR? No Yale - why did you drop out of Yale? 
RORY: It's complicated! 
JESS: It's not! It's not complicated!
RORY [defensive]: You don't know! J
ESS: This isn't you! This! You going out with this jerk, with the Porsche! We made fun of guys like this! 
RORY: You caught him on a bad night. 
JESS: This isn't about him! Okay? Screw him! What's going on with you? This isn't you, Rory. You know it isn't. What's going on? 

Then finally we’re back where we started, our couple’s last meeting; this takes place in the publishing house Jess co-runs with three other guys in Philadelphia. Rory is having trouble taking Logan back after an Ross-Rachel like “We were on a break” situation, involving all the bridesmaids at his sister’s wedding; Jess believes everything’s been sorted out, including “the blonde dick at Yale.” It’s clear that throughout this scene, there is something else there, the fact that, as airie_fairysaid: “…they always come back together somehow; they clearly want to be in each other's lives.” is painfully obvious. However, as always, the timing isn’t right for them. 

JESS: So... you fixed everything? 
RORY: Yeah. Everything's fixed. 
JESS: I'm glad you're here.
RORY: Yeah, me too. 
[He leans in and kisses her.] 

During a discussion about this last meeting drowning_inyou2said: “It's never as if the feelings and emotions are not there, because they kissed in (6.18) after being apart for three years.” It really is true, there is still something there, still something between them because otherwise nothing would’ve happened. It’s also painfully clear that Jess had expected something else of this visit, that by her being here, she was giving him the smoke signal he never got when he was seventeen. 

RORY: I couldn't even cheat on him the way he cheated on me. 
JESS [angry]: Who? Who cheated on you? [He realizes.] That - guy? 
[She nods sadly. He covers his face with his hand.] 
JESS: You're still with him. 
RORY: Yeah. 
JESS: I thought everything was fixed. 
RORY: Everything but him. 
JESS: I hate this! 
RORY: You should. I'm sorry. 
JESS: You came here alone. To Philadelphia. 
RORY: He was out of town. 
JESS: I don't deserve this, Rory 

So, we see that intellectually they are suited together perfectly, they have similar interests, but with enough difference to allow leeway and encourage debate. They are instantly attracted to one another, they can play off each other, they calm the other down. They bring out differences in each other, some good some bad. He forces her to grow up, to think about the not so innocent, to contemplate something other than her set plan. She forces him to accept who he is and deal with it, to think about doing something with his life. All of this and a connection between them that can‘t ever really be severed. Well, ladies and gentlemen, it is what it is. 

-- 
see next post for Part 2: "Bench Sitting, Shoe Staring'

Comments

[slytherinblack.livejournal.com]

FYI in case you haven't noticed you have some HTML issues going on here.

[aragons.livejournal.com]

Yep noticed that, but it submitted before I had a chance to fix them. LJ hates me.

Love the icon btw.

[slytherinblack.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :) Didn't make it myself, and I think whoever did should be listed in my info.

[undefinedwishes.livejournal.com]

literati ftw <33

[aragons.livejournal.com]

FTW indeed!

[undefinedwishes.livejournal.com]

they're together in the end- you just know it. They were always meant to be soulmates.

[aragons.livejournal.com]

They really and truly are, there isn't anyone else that come close to completing them the way the other does. Wow, vague much? But you know what I mean, there's nothing I think they couldn't overcome if they really wanted it. And there's so much there.

[undefinedwishes.livejournal.com]

*nods emphatically*

[slurp.livejournal.com]

I agree with you, Rory always seemed most alive when she was with Jess.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

HELLO I LOVE YOU

[aragons.livejournal.com]

OH GOD SOPHIE I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU READ THIS. god i wrote this when i was like 16. it shows.