Buffy/Angel (Buffy/Angel Fandom. Heh.)

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Title: B/A: Agony, Ecstasy and Hope
Author: Ducks, theantijoss
Spoilers: Explicit, through the end of both series
Email: ducksfanfic@yahoo.com
Personal Website: http://ducksfanfic.denialbubble.com

"A vampire in love with the Slayer. It's rather poetic – in a maudlin sort of way." Giles

I've been reading all the posts to ship_manifesto with a growing sense of awe and dread. So much treasure here: brilliant analyses and discussions of subtext and extrapolation from canon, academic journal-worthy reviews of the show's timelines from shippers' points of view and sharp, astute character and pairing sketches; opportunities to laugh, cry, sweat and remember eight years of TV greatness. Each one makes me sigh with envy and nostalgia.

And makes my job seem that much more daunting: to describe a relationship that spans the entirety of both series, is central to the past, present, and possible future of each show's protagonist, and elicits some of the most powerful reactions from fans (whether positive or negative) of anything else in the 'verse. Giving it a form that's palatable to everyone, while capturing the ship in all its melodramatic, epic, angsty, hopeful/hopeless glory is a lot like... walking uphill on my hands. Backwards. While very, very drunk.

How the Hell am I supposed to do that?

Let's face it, I'm not going to convert anyone new to B/A, no matter what I say here. And there's no way for me to really soften detractor's hearts toward this, my beloved OTP, either. Nor can I adequately represent the viewpoints of all the varied kinds of B/A Shippers in the fandom (and there are many more of us than you might expect), or cover all the possible angles from which this story can be told. So I'm going to take those pressures off myself right away, and tell you that I'm just going to ramble, and focus on me – talk about what I've seen and felt that makes me a B/A shipper.

Truthfully, I'm not comfortable the whole "essay" angle. I'm a fiction writer – a show-er, not a tell-er, and spelling it all out for you feels a lot like trying to accurately define what "love" is for someone who's never felt it.

I mean...It's B/A. From episode 1 of BtVS to episode 110 of AtS, it's been an undercurrent, a driving force in the Reality That Joss Built and a cornerstone in the individual foundations of Our Heroes themselves.

The pairing evokes in their fans (and creators) emotional words and catchphrases like Passion, Forever, Always. Transcendent. Eternal. Innocence. We believe they represent to one another that impossible dream of a future where they can rest and live the peaceful lives they've always dreamed of, free of the burdens of their identities and destinies. She was a break in his endless storm – a Moment of Perfect Happiness that, ironically, almost destroyed the world. He was the only one who she truly let in to her heart. She was the only one who ever really mattered (up to that moment, anyway. Connor is born shortly thereafter and rightfully usurps Buffy's place as #1 in Angel's heart). He was the one she loved more than she would ever love anything in this life.

That's a damn big story to tell, whether it's literally true or not.

It's a story that's been, by turns, touching and disturbing. Comforting and terrifying. Dark and dangerous, yet still filled with unexpected tenderness, giving and respect. They made each other better, stronger, physically and emotionally. They turned to one another in times of need. They healed one another. They were friends. (Never *just* friends, though. Spike was right about that.) They were able to share some of the weight of the world, find solace in one another. They repeatedly showed themselves willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of the other. They trusted each other with their lives. Neither was ever more vulnerable, or happier, or more content than during the earliest days when they were together, before the curse. And even when they were separated by that horrible twist of fate, when the fit really hit the shan, they have always managed to be there for one another (unless fate was doubly cruel, and forcibly kept them separated, ie. The Pylea Arc.). Even when they argue, even when they slam into that wall between them for the thousandth time, those moments are still filled with an abiding passion that you can almost taste.

That's the essential pull of them – the claddaugh personified. Love, loyalty and friendship. Basic, simple, tender affection. A gut-level draw to one another that defies the natural order of things, making you hope that maybe, just this once, love *can* conquer all. All set to a backdrop of horror, violence and death that seems like it should make such feelings impossible.

Of course, love doesn't conquer all. We know that in real life, and Buffy and Angel learn it themselves -- the hard way. The emotional punch of this relationship is that we learn it again, painfully and violently, right along with them.

Now, I'll admit my biases: I tend to see the Whedonverse through Angel-colored glasses. Seeing from his POV (as I imagine it), The B/A Saga looks something like this:

He's been alone, devoured by guilt for a hundred years, falling apart to the point where he is living in alleyways eating rats. He hates himself, hates what he's done, and basically just waits around for his eternity to be over. He has no hope or expectation of anything but this, forever. Hell on Earth -- a fitting punishment. And still less than he deserves, he thinks.

Then, the sun bursts through those clouds in the form of a sunny girl named Buffy Anne Summers, who just so happens to be the newest Chosen One. The Guardian standing between Humanity and "the vampires, the demons, and the forces of darkness". Quite against her will, and definitely outside her skill level, all while trying to maintain a "normal life".

The Slayer. And as inevitably happens in tragic love stories, he is instantly smitten by her, and overwhelmed with the urge to help her as she faces what he knows will be an ugly battle – because he used to be a soldier in evil's army. Angel suddenly finds the urge to make something of himself.

His Destiny, the Whistler tells him.

Buffy is the embodiment of goodness to Angel. The polar opposite of everything he is that he despises. Someone who is supposed to hate and kill him actually *cares* about him. Trusts him. Gives herself to him. Can you imagine anything more precious to a suffering creature than the love of someone he considers above him? Perfect Happiness, indeed.

And in less flowery terms, you could say he admires her heart, her courage, her abilities as a warrior. (No doubt her baby-butt soft skin and vanilla and sunshine scent don't hurt, not to mention the yummy mystical heroin pumping through her tasty veins like self-prepared gourmet take-out – lots of room for humor, darkness and depravity here as well, if that's your thing.). She makes him feel worthy of the second chance he's been given to do good in the world. For a long time, she is the only thing that keeps him going. Later, she is the reason he leaves what has become his home and sets off to find his own destiny. He loves her so much that he wants her to have a better life -- which he believes she can only have without him. He gives up part of his fondest dream – becoming human again – to prolong her life (or he believes) . When he receives news of her death, he leaves the country with barely a word, and spends three months coming to grips with his bitterness, grief and survivor guilt. By the end of his story, Buffy's emotional worth to him is superceded only by that of his son.

What about Buffy's point of view? Well, let's face it: in the beginning, she is a horny teenager who sees a obscenely hot guy and turns to goo. It's not that profound. Somewhere between the Hell and the High Water, though, she falls deeply in love with Angel. She grows to admire and respect him, and feels protective toward him in spite of what he was and what he'd done. Even when she finds out they're natural enemies, and that she's supposed to kill him. Even after she finds out he was once a vicious monster. Even after she discovers that they can't make love, because she makes him so happy that he loses his soul and turns back into that monster. Even after his soulless alter ego tries half-heartedly to kill her and then whole-heartedly to get the world sucked into Hell with her (and him) in it. Even after she is forced to send him to that Hell to save the world, even though he's just regained his soul and told her that he loves her too; even after he comes back and they play Come Here, Go Away for a year. Even after he breaks her heart, she kills her sister Slayer to feed him her blood, fails, and so almost dies saving him with her own blood, and even after he leaves her without saying goodbye and moves to Los Angeles and builds a life without her and yells at her and beats up her boyfriend and she dies without Angel at her side and comes back feeling more dead than ever, and she sleeps with Spike, and then Spike tries to rape her and gets a soul, and then Angel comes back and acts like Dawson Leary...

She still drops everything and flies into his arms when he asks if she's happy to see him.

By the end, they are old and battled-scarred, separated by seemingly still impossible odds, insurmountable issues, time and space, years of separate lives, other lovers, a bleak and probably short future, unspoken resentments and old, still-bleeding scars...

But here I still am, shipping them. And up to the last season of Angel, there they still were, loving each other. It's not a question of won or lost, lived or died, happy-ever-after or ambiguous-fence-sitting. It's not about whether I can convince you that B/A is worth shipping. To me, it's about this:

All the way through, Buffy and Angel cared deeply about one another. They moved on, got over, shuffled around one another, died and came back to life, and still they were connected. Their lives continued to intersect at important points, and ran curiously parallel the rest of the time. They've experienced other loves and other losses, but have never truly left the other behind, or gotten them out of their heart.

In the end, there was still hope for our heroes. We don't *know* if Angel really died in NFA. We don't know that Buffy didn't show up and help him fight the dragon, and afterward, they started talking about what they could do to start to fix things between them. You can't say they did, but in the grand denial tradition, you can't say they *didn't*, either. And that is the legacy we as shippers were left with. To carry on the story the way it plays in our hearts and minds. Yay for fanfic!

How can we not keep writing fanfic? They have so much in common now that Buffy and Angel are better suited for one another than they ever were in the days of graveyard smoochie-thons. Both have had time to learn and grow. They've embraced their responsibilities and accepted their duties, while completely changing what they assumed was their Destiny, and thus, taking power and control over their own lives. They've both raised children... sort of. (I mean, sort-of raised sort-of children.) They've both died and come back a few times. One's been to Heaven, the other Hell. Both lead their large, constructed families and the teams for their respective missions and carry that double weight on their backs alone, for the most part. She's seen more of the dark side – including her own – and come to terms with it. He's accepted that he's worth more than just a sword arm and eventually another stint in Hell. They have the ability, now, to take one another down off those old "first love" pedestals, and maybe grow just as close to the flawed, complicated beings they've grown into and now have a unique opportunity to get to know each other again as the heroes and adults they've become.

Underneath and in spite of all the baggage, there's a level of understanding between these two warriors that no one else who cares about them could ever achieve. Only they have stood at the front of that army and known they're about to die, and take most if not all of that army with them. Only they understand that when all else fails, they are the bottom line, the last hope for the world. And, though it's been beaten down and repressed over the years, they share a hope that someday a miracle could happen, and the Fates will be kind enough to bring them together the way they always wanted to be. Neither of them can wish it aloud anymore, but it still shines in their eyes when they look at one another.

I guess if you asked me, "Why do you ship B/A?", and I boiled all those complicated and's if's and but's down, I'm left with this simple -- but never easy – response:

Because every hero's heart deserves a home, and in the entire canon of either series, I have never seen either Buffy or Angel want, need or trust anyone or anything quite the way they want need and trust each other. And I think they deserve that much, at the very least.

Yup, it really is that plain for me. (Realistic or not is another question entirely.)

Damn it, now I'm all snuffly again. Some things never change.

In conclusion: Did I forget The Pretty? Yeah. There's that too. Big, dark, strapping lad; teeny tiny blonde girly-girl... you know the drill. Enforced celibacy (or the end thereof) also a big boost for the UST (or the RST). Supernatural strength and agility makes for interesting porn. As does bloodplay. *G*

~

Appendices:

B/A Resources:

Don't let the muttering fool you – there's a ton of good B/A fic out there.

The Top Five Classic Fics in B/A-dom, according to Ducks:

1. Anything by Harpy (http://harpy.bitchenvy.com) is a must for the beginning B/A reader, but for an especially poignant taste of Old School nostalgia, Buffy's Diary (http://harpy.bitchenvy.com/diary.html) can't be beat.
2. Phoenix Rising by Yahtzee (http://www.thechicagoloop.net/yahtzee/insect/insectfic/PhoenixIndex.htm) - futurefic
3. Bittersweet Legacy by Vatrixsta Cruden – Alternate Reality http://www.landofdenial.com/fic/VatrixstaCruden/chill.html
4. Storming Heaven by Margot LeFaye: -- Alternate Reality. How far will Angel go to bring Buffy back from the dead after The Gift? (Alt. BtvS Season 6) http://pages.prodigy.net/leighschneider/margotsfemfic.htm
5. The Silken Cage Series by Margot LeFaye – B/Aus Classic/Old School, WIP (still updating) http://pages.prodigy.net/leighschneider/margotsfemfic.htm

My Fic:
If people ask me what my favorite of my B/A fics are, I'll give them this list:

1. Bringing Him Back -- http://www.geocities.com/ducksfanfic/adult/bhb/
2. The Something Old Series – http://somethingold.basiamille.com
3. Worlds of Longing -- http://www.geocities.com/the_anti_joss/wol/
4. Demangent (co-written w/Vatrixsta Cruden, WIP never finished) -- http://www.basiamille.com/adult/Demangent/
5. Stages of Grief -- http://www.basiamille.com/fic/stage1.html


Fic Sites:

The Naughty Slayer (http://naugtyslayer.bitchenvy.com) – Old School Smutty Goodness
Land of Denial (http://www.landofdenial.com) – home of fic from the notorious BA_Fluff list. Everything B/A under the sun.
Chrislee's Octaves of the Heart "Good Words" Rec page: http://www.octavesoftheheart.com/goodwords.htm. She lists some of the finest B/A authors there (and she's one of them)
Starkitty's Adult Archive: http://starrkitty.150m.com/
The ChosenFics Rec Archive: http://chosenfics.com/ (Check out Pigpimping's Mr. Winky fics. Hee.)

Other B/A Resources:

B/A Fanlisting: http://forces-of-insanity.com/eaf/
Blood Roses: http://roses.darkstarfic.com/
Remember Me: http://www.onthefringe.org/remember/
Forever, That's the Whole Point: http://lavender.fortunecity.com/brett/671/forever.index.html
As I Close My Eyes (One of the oldest, I think): http://right-as-rain.net/ba/
Ducks' Babble Board (http://p216.ezboard.com/ftheducksversefrm1)/Ducks' B/A Fanfic Board (http://p216.ezboard.com/ftheducksversefrm2)
Romance On BtVS: (http://www.romance-on-btvs.com/) all the screenshots and pics you could ever wish for. There since the beginning.
A Moment's Thought: (http://www.stuck-in-the-middle.com/moments/) An even bigger gallery

Related LiveJournal Interests/Searches:
B/A, A/B, Buffy/Angel, Angel/Buffy, B/A Shipper


I'm always willing to discuss B/A or answer any questions you might have about the ship or any of my fics. (I've retired from arguing/debating, however, sorry. Also? I've read every possible flame, insult, hate mail, death threat and curse, so save those for somebody who won't point, laugh, and immediately share them with the general public. :)

ducksfanfic@yahoo.com

OMG!!! B/A OTP 4EVA!
Thanks to neverneverfic, amorousfear, and southernbangel for the priceless, immense and sparkly help, and to spren_cious for the awesome challenge!

Comments

[joshy.livejournal.com]

This was so beautiful and powerful...just when I think my love for the ship is fading, you bring it all rushing back so strongly. I really need to go watch those eps again. Thank you. :D

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

I love evoking the B/A love. I'm so glad you liked it! :) Thank you for feeding back!

[eirian.livejournal.com]

Brilliant :). When Im asked why I ship B/A I can never really put it into words, but you have done it perfectly. Thank you for sharing :)

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Thank you for reading and feeding back!

Believe me, it wasn't easy for me to put it into words like this either! I'm glad people are receiving it so well! :)

[gia6seconds.livejournal.com]

Just to echo kita0610, "Yeah baby". *BG*

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

*slurps you*

[guysrlkeslnkies.livejournal.com]

STANDS UP AND APPLAUDS

I think everything that can be said about this has already been said, but I just had you say:
YOU ROCK.
You perfectly illustrated everything, for me at least, that defines the B/A 'ship. Clearly, concisely, and beautifully, you spelled it all out.
Wonderful job, and don't you dare ever doubt your essay-writing skills again!

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Wonderful job, and don't you dare ever doubt your essay-writing skills again!

Hee! Okay, okay! And thank you! *smooch*

Your LJ name still makes me chuckle every time I see it. *G*

Wonderful

[(Anonymous)]

This essay was absolutely wonderful! A perfect summation of B/A...the love, the angst, everything. I was crying and smiling through the whole thing. Great job

-Michelle

Re: Wonderful

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I cried writing it, I'll tell you what. ;)

B/A Essay

[shannalee71.livejournal.com]

Wow...this was just...wow...
Wonderfully well said and all....amazing.
Im so glad there are people out there like yourself that can write so damn well.
Thank you for sharing this with us all.
*sniff* Great job

Re: B/A Essay

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Thank you for reading and feeding back! And for the sniffle. ;)

[summergal25.livejournal.com]

That was awesome Ducks! You captured everything in my opinon! Thank you for writing a wonderful piece for our beloved couple b/a!!

I bow down before you..all mighty..lol
Great job
Kristen

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Hee. Thanks, honey! I'm glad you liked it. *hugs*

[marinwood.livejournal.com]

Wow. What a great - I shouldn't say arguement...how about impassioned plea? - for The Best Relationship in all of Jossland. Brava!

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Yes, yes, impassioned plea! And entreaty to Joss to PLEEEASE give them some happiness! ;)

Futile, I know, but how can I not?

Thank you for the feedback!

[koos73.livejournal.com]

Hmmm, what can I say. Never realy liked or disliked B/A. (Still better than B/S and B/R though; Riley? Who's Riley?). It's mostly because of Angel who always becomes such a whimp when he is with her. I also don't like how the relationship started. He gets her on a golden plate (in the wrong way; something you should have adressed to) and I can't remember ever saw him being grateful for that.
Becoming II, her pushing him into Hell never worked for; not after what Angelus has done. (Her speech in Prophecy girl to him and Giles worked much more). You turning it into a plus. Hell, she couldn't even kill him right after he had killed Jenny. (She didn't have a stake with her and Kendra had to give her own!)

That said, are the moments that I do like Buffy/Angel. Oh, yes. Only after Revelations. Until Angel agreed with Buffy's plan to make Faith look black. (That's what I mean with being her whimp). And him draining Buffy in Becoming is not what I call a plus. She's a fool for his love, but is that a reason to like a ship?

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Obviously, we disagree very strongly, but thank you for commenting. :)

[koos73.livejournal.com]

Well, their story does have epic vibed. Don't see them as heroes though. More as people who *try* to be heroes.

I'm 'fraid that we'll never know if they ever gonna be together :)

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Luckily, that's what fanfic is for! :)

[morningsmile.livejournal.com]

Awesome, Miss Ducks. As others have said, this is perfect summation of our beloved BA. Thank you. :-)

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Thank you for reading and feeding back. I'm glad you liked it! :)

[spikendru.livejournal.com]

Well done! You did an excellent job in presenting your love of B/A an a nice analysis of the 'ship. I, personally, don't have an OTP; I enjoyed B/A through Graduation, adored early Spike/Dru, couldn't wait for Buffy and Spike to finally get together, thought Angel and Cordelia had a really solid foundation of friendship and mutual respect that could lead to a fulfilling relationship, and fantasize about Spike and Illyria making it through and finally hooking up. (And Connor going to Rome for some Uni-related reason and finally meeting Dawn. . .)

You helped me understand, in some ways, why B/A continues to be such a popular ship in the 'verse. Thank you for writing.

[tragicamente.livejournal.com]

Abso-fucking-lutely amazing.

It captures the beautiful pairing in all it's amazing glory and heart-ache. Came close to tears and not only did it strengthen my love for them, it also made me understand it more. It's so much nicer when you can have someone else put into words what you yourself can not explain.

Thank-you.

Really beautiful,

Love Faith

Aww... *sniffles*

[goldy-dollar.livejournal.com]

Dcuks,

I'm very late on the feedback, but I thought you deserved to hear how much I loved your essay. You managed to evoke all kinds of snuffly B/A memories in me. There was truly something special about B/A so that it didn't matter who they were with or how long they'd been separated for. They were still connected. Always. Forever. As a B/A shipper I never doubted, not for one minute, that they didn't love each other or that they didn't truly belong together.

All the way through, Buffy and Angel cared deeply about one another. They moved on, got over, shuffled around one another, died and came back to life, and still they were connected. Their lives continued to intersect at important points, and ran curiously parallel the rest of the time. They've experienced other loves and other losses, but have never truly left the other behind, or gotten them out of their heart.

*Points to what she said*

Brilliantly put.

You made me miss them *g*. I definitely don't obsess over B/A like I used to (thank GOD!), but reading this reminded me WHY I was so passionate and WHY they were so perfect.

Thank you muchly.

-Goldy

Re: Aww... *sniffles*

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

Goldy!!! *hugs you* Thank you so much. I got all nostalgic over them when I wrote it, too. *smooch*

[nerdanel.livejournal.com]

Ack, LJ ate my first post.

I'm new to Buffy. I didn't start watching until two months ago. And so, from August until now, I've been caught up in the glorious story of Buffy's and Angel's lives. I shipped B/A from S1, without hesitation or pause. My Spuffy friends from a different fandom (QAF) assured me that I would change ships after S5...S6...S7...but it never happened. I uneasily kept waiting for that moment when canon would show me how "over" Buffy and Angel were, when canon would show me that "although Angel was Buffy's first love, Spike is her true love". That moment never came. Episode after episode, I kept waiting for something to show me that the two didn't belong together - because that's what I'd been told would happen - but it just never did.

In a very short period of time, Buffy and Angel have become my OTP of OTPs. I have not seen any other pairing on-screen, ever, that I've felt as strongly about - and I've felt pretty strongly about some, most notably Brian and Justin from QAF. And you capture it so beautifully in this post. Thank you so much for writing it.

I read this soon after you first posted it, and I've kept coming back to read it as I moved through the episodes. (I tried to remain spoiler free at first, but then quickly realized that I *had* to know what happened to Buffy and Angel or I wouldn't be able to watch at all ;) And it's just so well put.

I've gone back and read through Buffy messageboards - some seeming nothing more than deserted ghost-towns, now. I've seen the wanking and kerfluffling that happened, the anxieties and the disagreements, and somehow, when reading this ship manifesto, it seems so superfluous...there's Buffy, and there's Angel, and there's the glorious romance that is Buffy and Angel. What need for further discussion is there? ;)

Thanks again for this post, from a newbie.

- Bethany

[mystripedskirt.livejournal.com]

Excuse me while I love you and bow down to your greatness. I admit I had a couple of tears flowing earlier, but no fear, I have the Buffy DVDs to cheer me up!

B/A is the only way to go. Honestly. Do they not see that David Boreanez and SMG are so much more attractive than James Marsters and Charisma Carpenter?

[wackinessensues.livejournal.com]

Ducky Ducky Ducks!

*bats eyelashes*

I'd jump for joy (with a little limp to the right) if you'd let me archive this at Deep In (http://www.fangedfour.com/deepin).

I'm so glad it was *you* to write the B/A manifesto because you just rock!

Smooches! I miss you!

[quasi-hayley.livejournal.com]

Who better to write this? Excellent, fantastic and wonderful.

Please may I archive it at Archaic Reputation (http://quasi-evil.net/angel)?

[ohmyhannah.livejournal.com]

Can I just say that I love you.. and this too. :D

This is absolutely wonderful. I agree with every.single.word.

[the-hero-factor.livejournal.com]

I'm a bit late to the party, but I just wanted to say great essay. Just lovely. And I completely agree.

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

thank you! It's never too late to receive praise like that. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

[engravedheart.livejournal.com]

if u love the jossverse so much, why is ur name theantijoss?

and one other question (cuz i know i might get a lot of shit about it even though im an obvious ba shipper)
why did angel originally fall for buffy? i mean i understand why a 26 yr old or other would but angel has the maturity of a 200 year old and as kind and innocent buffy was at first and quite the hottie mind you, still there must be some childness about her that could have turned him off. if he looked his age, we would have all thought the relationship was gross. it's the fact that he's hot that makes it seem like it's okay. but even if he looked like a 40 old dating a 16 year old, it still would feel gross let alone a 243 yr old.

im still in total support of the relationship because i truly see the love beyond the age difference. it is just the beginning that concerns me with angel. because he couldnt have seen her all of her potential at first, could he? she was witty and funny and cute but she didnt give that older than her age vibe yet till after she needed to kill him.

so age should have bothered him at first i guess.. since he also should know how difficult a teenager is with the not knowing who you are yet and such. i am personally turned off by highschoolers and im IN highschool.

what do you think?

[blackbeltchic.livejournal.com]

Wow...I haven't read the whole thing yet, it's long, and pretty daunting, but I really like the way you started it off, and you've got me hooked. I am so going to finish this in just a few minutes.

But first, I wanted to ask you something. I am the mistress of Ai Jinmarai, a Buffy/Angel archive, and whatever you want to call this masterpiece, whether it's an Essay or a reflection, I would really like to add this to my website, with your permission, of course. If you want to check it out, the link is http://buffyangelforever.nexuswebs.net.

Thanks so much for your time!

Karen
bawebmistress@nexuswebs.net

[blackbeltchic.livejournal.com]

Okay, I finished reading it, and I want to say that you are the bestest person ever! (incredibly lame, I know) You just explained everything that I felt for and the reasons I liked B/A above all else and wrote it down in a way I would have never been able to do. You are brilliant!

Karen

lovely

[shinysilvergrl.livejournal.com]

And I support it all. It's just a pity that there was so much less of everything you talked about in the final seasons. Like the part where Buffy sends her slayers out to get the insane, homicidal one that Angel's found, taking her off his hands because she doesn't trust him after having "sold out" to W&H. That always bothered me because it felt like a total betrayal of the core B/A trust...that willingness to get each other's back.

Otherwise, I'm with you 100% :) Very well written, thank you.

-sil

[got_swagger]

I'm somewhat new to Buffy, and completely and utterly a Bangel shipper.

I'm a convert, actually, and only caught Buffy on TV after she had started *insert verbage of your choice* Spike, and I supported B/S for the longest time, up until I found out in Season 7 the events of Season 6's "Seeing Red."

After the series ended, I didn't get back into Buffy until late 2006/early 2007. I bought the first Season on DVD, and I completely and utterly feel in love with the Buffy/Angel relationship. Not just the romance, but the friendship and the shyness and caring that was there. Season 2, which I bought not too long after, completely sealed the deal, and this year, after finally getting and watching the rest of the Seasons, I'm a Bangel shipper now more than ever. I don't think I've ever shipped a pairing in any fandom I've been in until Buffy/Angel.

Your manifesto is brilliant, and pretty much perfectly explains all the reasons why I love Buffy/Angel and why I support it the way I do. It was insightful and completely and utterly true to the pairing.

T_G

Thanks for writing such a great manifesto!